Coping with Annoyance

College like the rest of your life, will introduce a special person who you just won't like. A professor, boss, in-law or a coworker can fit this category perfectly.

I call these people "special" because they are the ones who will drive you insane.

It takes time, but you CAN deal with these people.  Dealing with difficult people takes patience and maturity and believe me, biting your tongue isn't the easiest thing to do but it can be the smartest thing in the long run.

When placed in a situation where you feel yourself slipping away, keep a few things in mind.

1. Empathy: Put yourself in their shoes.  This does not mean feeling bad for the person, just try and see this disagreement from their point of view.  Sometimes it's easier to point the finger than to look in the mirror and realize that you might be the one who is wrong.  It helps to stand back and truly focus on the situation.  Right before an argument is about to start, focus on what the other person is saying, it might help resolve the issue before it escalates.

2.Take a breath: Some people are hot heads and can easily flip out.  If you can calm yourself down, you can possibly avoid a negative situation.  No one knows you better than you.  If you reach a point where one smart remark can throw you over the edge, it is time to inhale, and exhale. Count from one to ten, roll your shoulders back a few times, pray to your "ALL MIGHTY" or just grab your ears and "Woosah, Woooooooosahhh"

3.Just be quiet: I am for speaking your mind and standing up for what's right, but sometimes we can get carried away.  I believe that knowing when to speak can help everyone grow as people.  Remember when you were younger and you heard the infamous line "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all"? That line might have not meant anything to you then but as you get older you'll see that it is actually a very helpful tool when dealing with an aggravating person. Knowing when to speak can save you a terrible headache.

Life is about growing and learning from our mistakes.  Keep in mind that college is an important stepping stone in your life.  As much as you might want to put a professor in the octagon and drop a flying a kick, realize that life doesn't always offer such a barbaric alternative.

(unless you don't mind spending some time in prison for aggravated assault)

SO NO FLYING KICKS!




Catch you next time.

L.U.J

The Uncivil Professor

The core of civility issues in higher education lies at the heart of education itself׀the classroom.  The knee-jerk reaction to an effort to address classroom incivility might be to view students as the exclusive source of incivility.  As one commentator noted, Ӏill-mannered antics of college students are a tradition as old as academe itself.Ԁ While itҀs probably true that most civility issues involve students and their attitudes and behaviors towards others, sometimes professors are to blame.  

The relationship between a student and a professor is a critical component of student learning. A professorҀs ability to transmit knowledge and promote inquiry based on research, study, and practical experience is one of the fundamental purposes of education. While most instructors are committed to free discussion and open inquiry, there have been growing concerns that some college classrooms are becoming platforms for political and social indoctrination, where students are essentially attacked for reasoned views that are contrary to those of the instructor. When faculty publicly debase, humiliate, or invalidate students during classroom discussions, they essentially provoke student incivility.

Professors often rely on their right to academic freedom to justify uncivil actions taken in the classroom. Faculty academic freedom typically includes the right to study, discuss, investigate, teach, and publish. However, academic freedom does not give faculty the right to say or do whatever they want in the classroom.  Specifically, academic freedom does not protect a professor who compromises a studentҀs right to learn in an environment free of hostility or engages in controversial speech unrelated to the course.  For example, according to the American Association of University Professors (AAUP), professors should Ӏencourage free discussion, inquiry, and expressionԀ and that Ӏstudents should be free to take reasoned exception to the data or views offered in any course of studyԀ regardless of the professor's views. AAUP further recommends that Ӏstudents should have protection through orderly procedures against prejudiced or capricious academic evaluation.Ԁ The AAUP policies, while not mandatory, provide guidance as to how professors should engage students.

Poor classroom management may also cultivate an environment that breeds incivility. Some professors ignore incidents of student rudeness or incivility in the classroom. However, there is research to suggest that failure to address uncivil student conduct in the classroom sends the messages that the behavior is condoned and that incivility can be repeated. When a professor is unable to manage the classroom, and student incivility persists unchecked, student grades, learning, and achievement will be adversely affected. (see Classroom Decorum: What Happened and Does it Matter?)

Faculty behavior is an important component of promoting civility on campus. The attitudes of professors toward students may have profound implications on learning and civility. When promoting civility, colleges and universities must be willing to look within. Are administrators, teachers, and staff modeling civil behavior? If not, efforts to push civility may appear to be insincere and somewhat hypocritical to students. 

Kent M. Weeks